Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Did it anyway..

You know how older people always tell you that this time in your life with kids at young ages is the best time in your life? Or maybe it's just me, but every middle-aged adult I look up to tells me that looking back over their life, the best years by far were when their children were small. I think about this all the time and I try to share their perspective NOW, but it's hard. I don't know if it's truly possible to fully appreciate it for what it is when you're in it. When you're in it--you're feeling all the weight of it, the responsibility, the discipline, the worries, the finances, the lack of sleep, etc. Parenthood is hard. The reward is far worth the work, but it's hard. Today was a day when I didn't want to get up to that 6:30 alarm, but I did it anyway. I got the kids dressed and fed and off to school. And when I got home, I didn't want to take a shower (again) but this was day 3, so I did it anyway. I didn't feel like loading the dishwasher up and dragging trashcans in and folding laundry, but I did it anyway. And after school I didn't feel like driving Jake to tennis and entertaining his little brother and sister for an hour at the park while he played, but I did it anyway. And because I was feeling so sluggish, I made myself take them out for ice-cream afterwards. They had been anxious to use their "free ice-cream cone" coupons and I really didn't want to do it today, but..we did it anyway. I dread those 3 hours between the time kids get home and daddy comes home from work. Today they were feeling especially long, so I drug our food outside for a dinner picnic. The kids were thrilled! You would have thought I bought them new toys. It was worth it..all of it. Sometimes there's no motivation and everything feels mundane. Sometimes remembering my gratitude isn't enough. Sometimes thinking of those who are far worse off than me and who would give anything to trade places doesn't help. It just doesn't. I promised you honestly on this Blog always, even when what I'm sharing is not admirable. The bright spot is the knowledge that on tough days when I feel like I'm just existing, I can do the things I'm supposed to do anyway. Just because.

3 comments:

  1. This is a truth that we don't often voice as stay at home parents. Parenthood is a life of service for sure! But the pay off is pretty awesome.

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  2. It's part of being a parent. It makes us function when it's the last thing we want to do. If were lucky, well get an immediate resonse that makes it all worthwhile, but not always. The real payoff is years later when you hear them tell the stories about making cookies, picnics in the yard and chocolate pie fights in Mamas clean kitchen that you really know it was all worth it.

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  3. Isn't powerful what the love for our kids makes us do. We do it anyway... because we love them so much! So true!

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